It's my turn for the crown please

I grieve and dare not show my discontent,
I love and yet am forced to seem to hate,
I do, yet dare not say I ever meant,
I seem stark mute but inwardly do prate.I am and not, I freeze and yet am burned,
Since from myself another self I turned.

Thoughts, Secrets, and a little Bitterness

Ah, I have been working nonstop recently, and I love it. My legs are hating me at the moment though, because apparently I have been too inactive for too long, I get some swelling with water in them through my shift. Now it is about two weeks into working here, and it's finally stopped. I'm still careful though, I drink water throughout my entire shift and eat very little salt the same day I'm working.

Whit's fur ye'll no go by ye!

Jamie, my dear Jamie. You've went and left me and now I'm holding onto only one in my small family to remember I am apart of them.